It’s no surprise that men and women have different views of relationships. While some of these differences make life more interesting, others can destroy relationships before they have a chance to get serious. One of the most frequent issues our relationship experts hear about between a man and a woman is the fear of commitment. Typically, one partner is ready to take the relationship to a new level by getting married or moving in together while the other is grounded in fear. Understanding the ways that men and women differ when it comes to making relationship decisions is the first step toward overcoming commitment issues.
Sometimes It’s Just Timing
Women often set relationship goals based upon a time table. For example, couples therapists frequently hear a woman complain that she believes it is time to get married because she and her partner have been living together for five years. Meanwhile, men tend to have specific personal goals in mind that they want to achieve before they get married, such as finishing college or reaching a certain level in their career. Women also tend to reach the decision to get married at a younger age, while many men do not do so until their late 20s or 30s.
Dating Goals Differ Between The Sexes
It is also important to understand the different views of dating that men and women hold. For many women, the dating game is an annoying process that is filled with kissing too many frogs to find their prince. Once they find their prince, they are ready to settle down. Men, however, typically enjoy dating, and they may refuse to settle down out of the fear that there is someone better out there. Women can also fall into this trap and avoid commitment so that she can trade up if someone better comes along.
Past Traumas Affect Emotional Bonding
Relationship tips for men often address finding ways to help them open up about their emotions. This is especially important for men who may be dealing with commitment issues that stem from trauma in their past. For example, a man who is recovering from an affair may be hesitant to commit to someone out of the fear of being hurt again. Men often deal with commitment phobia out of the fear that they will make the same mistakes as their father. While women also tend to avoid commitment due to being cheated on in the past, they are also more likely to have experienced other types of trauma such as abuse that has damaged their ability to trust. For this reason, anyone who is getting over an abusive relationship may need online dating help from professional experts to work through their trauma so that they can have healthy future relationships.
Despite how far men and women have come towards finding equality between the sexes, it is important to note that societal pressures still play a role when it comes to settling down. When you hit a roadblock, use relationship communication tips to get to the bottom of the real issue. Realizing that your partner is just afraid of being hurt again can salvage your relationship while you work toward building a real committed partnership.