Bad habits such as eating too much junk food might not hurt anyone but yourself. However, there are other habits that are far more devastating to the person who loves you the most. Once the honeymoon period is over, many people fall into behavior patterns that create problems for their marriage. These four bad habits are common factors leading to divorce, so it is important to take action now if you recognize them in your marriage. That way, you can begin working on learning how to improve your relationship.
Falling Into Negative Communication Patterns
Nagging, insulting, and yelling are all communication issues that continuously break down your marriage. While it might not seem like a big deal to harp on your partner about their socks always being left on the floor, this generates negativity that makes it harder for them to listen when you come to them with a real issue. The good news is that positive communication is a skill that can be learned. Our Cuppls Recommend Relationship Counselors are experienced in helping couples to learn how to communicate better so that you can speak openly and honestly to resolve issues in a way that makes both of you feel good.
Harboring Secrets From Your Partner
Aside from stashing a birthday gift away until your loved one’s special day, you should never keep secrets from your partner. Too often, people think it is easier to just leave out the truth when they don’t want to hurt their partner or start an argument. Sadly, secret keeping often starts out as a small moment of deceit, such as simply not mentioning that you spent too much on that new purse, but it can turn into you hiding bigger things down the road. Eventually, your partner will find out what you are hiding, and trying to untangle a large web of secrets can permanently damage your marriage. When you feel a need to keep a secret, ask yourself why you cannot tell your partner. Then, work on resolving that issue so that you can avoid being wracked with guilt.
Refusing to Correct Dangerous Behaviors
There are some bad habits that can instantly destroy a marriage, such as choosing to engage in an affair. Yet, there are others that tend to slowly break down your marriage until your partner can no longer feel safe staying together. For instance, an addiction to shopping, pornography, gambling, drugs, and alcohol are all dangerous for your marriage. This is because each of these behaviors also places your spouse at risk for having to deal with the emotional and physical consequences of your decisions. Although dealing with addiction is hard, it is possible to recover with the help of our counselors who can help you work on finding an appropriate treatment plan and healing your marriage.
Ignoring Your Role In the Family
You might feel as though you are doing nothing wrong when you spend hours online or playing video games. After all, you are home with your family and not out doing bad things. However, it is a problem when you are not fully involved with your family. Your spouse should know that they can lean on you for support with managing the household and raising your kids. Feeling ignored or like they are the only person doing all of the work leads to resentment that destroys relationships. Work with your partner to determine how much time to yourselves feels comfortable. Then, make sure to carve out enough time to connect as a couple so that you can strengthen your bond.
No one is perfect, and neither is anyone’s marriage. Yet, you should always be constantly striving to improve your relationship so that your marriage stays strong. When you know that you have a bad habit that is ruining your marriage, make the commitment to change. This way, you can look forward to improving yourself as well as making sure that the person you love knows that you believe your marriage is worth saving.